Every year I would pick resolutions and goals to help guide me in the upcoming year.
And every year I failed.
This year I picked three words, three themes for the year. I started this last year, copying the idea from other bloggers I read and follow. After years of making resolutions and abandoning them after a few months, I was ready to try something new. I hoped that this would prove to be a better influence in the long run.
I’m not going to lie… I did think that it wouldn’t make much of a difference. I thought that, ultimately, my “words” would off my radar after a few months, the same as my resolutions normally did.
I was wrong.
Last year’s words were: Simplify. Focus. Create. And somehow I managed to stay on track with these themes for most of the year.
This year’s three words are: Reduce. Balance. Invest.
REDUCE: This is exactly what it sounds like — I’m going to reduce the clutter in my life. And I do mean the things I have, the things I do, and the mental and emotional baggage I accumulate.
BALANCE: I am going to start including more time for fun, family, and friends. I need to start going out and actually doing things, living life, instead of reading about it. In addition, it’s hard to write about interesting things if you’re not doing interesting things.
INVEST: I am going to make an effort to invest time and money in myself. This includes the more formal personal and professional development and the more whimsical things that will feed my creativity and spirituality.
And I’m hoping that 2013 is a more productive and successful year.
2012 ended up being a very different year than what I was expecting. This year my personal health challenges dominated everything, and impacted most of the year. I was either preparing for surgery, out for an extended leave because of surgery, or recovering from it. I honestly feel like I just got back to normal in time to ring in 2013. Great timing, I guess.
Despite the challenges of the year, or maybe cause of them, I had moments of clarity… aha! moments that made me sit up (figuratively) and take notice of things for which to be thankful, things to change, and things to share. Sometimes it takes big events to makes us take a look at the little things that shape our lives.
A few things I “learned” in 2012
You are who you friend (i.e., grouchiness is contagious).
I’m not talking about social networks, or rather I’m mostly talking about real life. I can’t speak for the rest of you, but the group of people I see and with whom I spend time in my offline life is slightly different than those with whom I interact online. I’m referring to those people who can take one look at you and tell that you’ve had a bad day, who you can call at 2am with an emergency, who will pick you up at the airport and possibly even feed you afterwards. Friends.
There’s a saying in Spanish: Dime con quien andas y the dire quien eres. Loosely translated it means that I can tell the kind of person you are by who your friends are.
I’ve realized the truth of that recently. I’ve found that if I spend my personal time with friends (beloved friends) who encourage me to dwell on the negative aspects of my life, I don’t crawl back out of that mood. And, slowly, the negativity becomes normal… an everyday occurrence. Then somehow the new personal projects don’t get started, or don’t get finished. If I spend my time with friends (and family) who are out creating, encouraging me and others, providing emotional and even virtual support, I’m more productive.
There’s no science behind this (not for me). Just the observable truth comparing 2012, and my friending habits, versus previous years. 2012 was more challenging, had bigger hiccups and roadblocks, and yet I accomplished more. More importantly, my reaction to the challenges was more positive.
Your support system is esential, at home and at work (i.e., you WILL need help eventually).
I am a very independent person.
I don’t like to ask for help, I want to do things myself.
I hate needing help; I don’t want others to see that I can’t do everything myself.
I had to ask for help.
If you’ve ever had to recover from major surgery, you know that there are days, weeks, months where you need to be nursed. Family members made it possible for me to simply recover without having to deal with the everyday details that would have added stress to the recovery.
Did you know there’s nothing good on daytime television? Friends made it possible for me to disconnect from personal relationships without boredom kicking in by providing entertainment on demand, and many many visits (when I was feeling better).
In the many weeks of recovery, I didn’t get one single “emergency” phone call from work. Colleagues made it possible for me to disconnect from work completely without having to worry about pending projects or emergencies.
I hope none of them ever need me to do the same for them, but know I will gladly step up and help them when it’s needed.
Other people don’t live inside your brain (i.e., write it down).
One of the most interesting things I realized this year is how much of my job processes I keep in my head. Since I work in an organization that achieves miracles with very few resources, it’s become almost mandatory that everyone take on many roles.
Because I had advance notice, and was able to schedule the time away from work. I was able to get everything set up for my absence. I wrote instructions, and more instructions, and guidelines, and style manuals, and best practice documents, etc. And I held training sessions, provided feedback on early transition projects, identified what the backup systems and people were, and put everything into place early.
If I had been hit by a bus, there are many projects that might have hit a snag because the plans were in my head.
Work will survive without you (i.e., you are not indispensable).
I was away from my office for seven weeks. Once I came back to work I wasn’t at full capacity for a few more weeks. Guess what? They survived just fine without me.
I tend to be that workaholic who stays another 30 minutes because “I really gotta finish this tonight.” I would stress over the workload that I still had pending, mostly without giving myself credit for the work that was successfully finished.
What I’ve seen since I’ve been back is that, while the deadline is still there, I’ve been better about prioritizing what actually has to be done today and what can wait until tomorrow. In addition, did you know that others can handle the hard stuff too? {{grin}}
